Spooky Story Youth Contest Winner, Age 11 and Under: "The Invitation"

Spooky Story Winner
Theo C.
Star Rating
Reviewer's Rating
Nov 6, 2023

The Invitation

By Theo C., grade 4

(transcribed by his mom)

It was a dark and stormy night. I had gotten an invitation to this scary haunted house for free. I thought, “Oh, this is gonna be so lame, like the other haunted houses.” Then, something on the paper appeared in one of the blank spaces. It read “This is going to be like Nothing you have ever experienced.” So I thought, “Letters appearing out of nowhere? Maybe this will be a good haunted house after all. I might even scream.” 

So I went to the place, which looked like a very old Western town. A tumble weed was rolling in front of me. Suddenly, out spread its stick-like vines and it looked more like a spider now. It even had eyes! Out from the top where all of the vines meet, came a very long bushweed vine. It was so fast, I couldn’t react. Either that, or I was hypnotized from fear!

This place actually felt real! Maybe if I could get to the Haunted House, I would be safe. Maybe I could call home from there. I tried to make a run for it, but the long tumbleweed vine wrapped around my legs, and was starting to wrap around my arms and waist. When suddenly, a duck with the face on the back of his head (he also had teeth) used his flame-thrower to burn the tumbleweed to ashes. 

I was going to thank him, when he said “My name is G. Dudder, but you can call me ‘The Last Thing You Will Ever See’.” I made a run for it. I hid in one of the old-fashioned houses. I don’t think he saw me go in there. But someone else did. Someone that was in there. Before I knew it, sixteen eyeballs were glancing at me from the dark. Some boards fell down and I saw that they were white bats with Grim Reaper hoodies and they had much bigger mouths than normal bats. That instant, they all flew at me with their mouths open wide.

I made a run for it. Luckily, I made it to the door and to safety. Safety from the bats, at least. But when I looked back, I saw that the bats had chomped through the wood. G. Dudder suddenly appeared, chasing off the bats. I was glad he chased away the bats, but I didn’t want him to end me either. 

So I dashed into this even bigger old house. Luckily, there was a light bulb on, filled with electricity. At first, I was relieved, but then I thought “What is a lightbulb doing in such an old building? And why is it on?” Suddenly, the back door opened and in came a clown with the head of a Ferris Wheel. He was followed by a gang of other clowns that were “normal” (but still spooky).

Suddenly, the bats appeared again, and so did the tumbleweed spider and some other tumbleweed spiders. They got most of the clowns by eating them. But the Ferris Wheel clown and three other clowns were still chasing me! “I have to get them off my tail!” I thought.

The next thing I knew, giant vines with knife-like thorns on them started popping out of the ground! While this happened, the floor was unstable. It was hard to run. Some of the rubble behind me fell for some reason. There was a giant mouth behind me whose teeth were the razor-like thorns. He finished off the rest of the clowns. He tried to finish me off, but I was no longer there.

I was in a more carnival-like part of town. “If the clowns own this part of town, at least they’re not here anymore,” I thought. But I was wrong. Out came a bird-like jester. I made a run for it, but he kept throwing bombs at me! I think he said his name was “Jester McKook”. Anyway, I turned a corner, climbed a rooftop, jumped down. “I think I lost him. Phew!”

I was whistling with my eyes shut, thinking there were no more monsters. When suddenly, I walked into an electric spider web! Luckily, it didn’t shock me. But the bad news was that there was a gigantic spider, crawling down, ready for dinner. 

I shut my eyes, thinking I was done for. It was about to take a bite out of me when… I didn’t really see the start, since my eyes were closed. But I did hear some yelling and wrestling. It was G. Dudder and Jester McKook. I thought, “This is my chance to get away from this place” So I squirmed and I tussled with the electric web, and I got out! But, the battle was ending, so I needed to get somewhere fast. I ran to the haunted house, opened the door, and slammed it behind me. I jammed it with a metal board so they couldn’t get in. I looked around me at the entrance. Just as I had suspected: an old-fashioned phone!

I was going to dial 911, when, instead of numbers on the dial, it was EYES! It opened its mouth, which was right below the dial. It said “Finally, food for Phone McIck!!!”

I could see why they called him “McIck” since there were a lot of black blobs under where he was standing. The phone turned into a hand, and grabbed me by the shirt. I thought fast and saw a pair of scissors. I cut the line! He said “You think this is something?!! I’ll just regrow it back!” 

I said, “Not before I get out of this place!!!”

I opened a door and ran up a spooky creaky staircase. I opened the door in the hall, and it was kind of creepier than the first. There were old pictures hanging on the sides of the wall. Out came robotic dogs! I grabbed an iron bar and started swinging! I couldn’t hit them all, so I went through another door and closed it behind me.

There was a black weenie cat. There was a puddle under it. I looked behind and it was blood. I looked back at the cat. It was now a skeleton, then it disappeared completely out of sight. The next thing I knew, I was part of the puddle of blood.

Reviewed by Heather M
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