I get part of her one day.
And a part of her the next.
I rarely see the same side twice.
But I don’t blame her,
 Because she is dying inside.

Cancer is Ludicrous. 
But has blessed my life.
It defines my character.
And has made me who I am.

He makes me laugh
He makes me smile
We goof off
He sees a side of me that no one else sees
The silly side the ridiculous side
The “Let’s make up a word to mean this” side
We have each other’s back

Dear Body,
I’m sorry 
For all of the hate you're given
I know you're just trying to make a living
And go on with your life as it is
But every day you're seen in a mirror
And at that moment you’re seen clearer
Even when I’m just looking down

Many people can’t fathom
my language
or why I communicate 
in a manner different 
than them.
They fear oddity,
panicking at the individual
who will violate
the common order 
regulated by humanity 
With cruel language 

I am an emerald waterfall flowing with knowledge,
Running through life like a wolf. 
While my imagination is like sea, always more to discover.
There’s more to me than what meets the eye, 
And only some can see it.
I know people but they don’t know me, 

All eyes on those who shimmer with dialogue
All eyes on those with tongues aflame,
blinded
 by their empty words
that block genuine insight.

“Work Harder,
Do better,
Study more,
Don’t act stupid,
Pay attention.”
These are the things that run through my mind nonstop,
But they don’t know.
I call myself dummy after dumb blonde,
But they don’t know.

Being a creator isn’t easy. Your inside thoughts and feelings are always on display to everything on the outside.

When I am alone
I talk to things
Things that aren't there
Because I have no one else to talk to
When I am alone
I listen to music
Because I like some noise
When I am alone
I get sentimental
Because I like to reflect
When I am alone

I am not you
I am not your height
or weight
or the way you wake up in the morning
I am not the way you comb your hair
or drive a car

I didn’t ask for your 
insecurities
Or your hands 
To venerate me.

Your foundation is no different than that of your neighbors,
    ground firmly into the cool of the Earth with no concern
    for those who dwell above you.
Your walls beg to tell a different story, desperate for language

The lights of the city shine brighter than any star.
a cool breeze cuts through the humid night air.
the sidewalk is cracked by too many steps in everyone’s one-thousand-mile journey.
Brick and concrete towers fly high into the sky, close enough to reach the stars.

Born a peasant
always a peasant
work, work, work
never stopping
bound to the land
living from it
I sleep thinking,
why me?
I want to leave
I want to die
but what will happen to my family?
how will they survive?

Republican
Yes! Bless The New U.S...
Making America Great Again
With only the best.
I must confess this victory came a little shocking.
I wasn’t expecting Trump to win,
The way the media was talking.
I was walking,

clouds
pink and blue smears
go over my head
like the moon
or calculus.
i long to float up there
where i could eat eclipse and crackers
and differentiate my thoughts.

At the grocery store
In the days of our youth
The green twist ties were the best part.

So easily entertained were we
With these simple pliable toys
Laughing and forming new shapes.

Bleach blonde braids fall across my shoulders
as caramel curls caress my cheeks all for the low, low price
of my life’s savings and a bottle of bleach

They say that time is a constant,
In math world it is an unchanging letter k. 
But I say that it becomes a variable,
A perfect letter x. 
Time can be carefully controlled, ceaseless,
A cascading current.
But time becomes elastic, expendable,

“Take all the time you need,”
They said.
But now I’d much rather be in bed,
Because I’m 76 today.
My life is beginning to fade away.
“Take all the time you need,”
They said.
I hope you’re happy.
Now I’m dead.

look at them,
so cavalier, drinking
future-liquor in a future-

                bar kissing the wounds
                of future-lovers and
                crisscrossing their future-

scars
look at them,
so ambiguous, with

Between her slender fingers she pivots the earth
Amused by how the blues and greens twirl
We let the motion power us
Letting it rock us and push us, haunt us and slow us.
Our lives are dictated by her constant motion.
A motion beautifully blind to us.

It’s my last day with the old giants
In mourning I hike the lost trails,
sniffing the aroma of the bark,
that cinnamon of the forest
Under tepees of wood
in a membrane of shadows,
I stalk the earth, its mammal traces,
its elusive tracks,

Varuna pulled forth the world the heavens the stars
With a roll of his tongue he wrenched time in her place
A word on his lips and the floods would recede
From sludge he said let there be more

When we wake, we stretch to
fill out our expectations of where
what should be & then we look in
the mirror for confirmation is this
me is this me is this & we know it’s

The sun dawns upon me
Again I’m greeted to gasps of reality
Holding onto dreams I can disappear into 
until the day breaks, bright and true
Every morning I breathe incapabilities 
but I still wake with a certain heart

Time is a girl with curly hair that bounces with every step and twirl she takes
She talks with her hands but never fails to find the right word to say
She can be by your side one second and gone the next
Getting lost in the crowd is fun to her

I seduced Time
I brought her thorny flowers, held her worn hands and kissed her softly
I caressed her flushed cheeks and played with her hair, long like a timeline
I ran my hands along her battle-won scars and her strong but delicate body

145: i looked normal for a girl my size, a little extra meat on my bones but nothing to make me despise the body i lived in. Until i started comparing myself to the girls around me. maybe i should lose a couple pounds see that’s how it started.

the void beckoned.
i stood softly
quaking
afraid
what is there is to do in the void?
i pondered quietly
the void answered,
nothing.
perfect.
i replied
i need time
i need time
i need time

i need rest