it’s been a while
        since I found encouragement
        to rid myself of this
        writer malnourishment
        I guess I lost myself
        trying to explore the world
        yet I still found my mind in the gutters
        and the oil stains
        left on the street in front of my house
        my car and I share similarities
        our oil finds its way
        to permeate the days
        and leaves us unable to ignite
        due to a lack of substance
it sure has been a while
        since I felt alive
        I am so tired and strung out
        I keep on strumming and picking
        but my fingers cannot coordinate
        with a lack of rhythm
        I get lost in the music
        so often that I can’t bring myself into reality
but maybe because it’s been a while
        since I saw the good in people
        or even in myself
        I hate this lack of human inside me
        I just flip through channels and can’t choose one
        I am always changing; good and bad
        we are told to never see the dark side of things
        but the world I live in makes it so easy
it has been a while
        since I spoke on my emotions
        but I have motion sickness
        and my mind is nothing but static