Been sitting still the whole day
Can’t sleep
Thank you trazowhatervthehellyouare
For the frog and the eyes
And the image of my
Ex-girlfriend in the sun and
What am I saying?
What’ve I done?
I convince myself that swallowing this pill
Is aborting 50 sheep
And see red hoof marks on the ceiling
With my eyes closed
And I smile,
Convincing myself I’m not dreaming
And have a little fun with it
Before I fall asleep
And down and up
And behind my eyes like a god
Overlooking the rain
I embrace this saccharine love of the cold toed puddle
And backroad trips and highway falls
And baby sheep nursing my blood
Until they scream metallic can kicking prayer
In crowns woven of my eyelashes--
Uprooted by their dark velvet mouths
And fluttering black eyes
Swimming away from me,
Amorphous, like snails,
Screaming rah rah rah rah rah
Biting the bad people
Off my hands---
Before I wake up in sheets
smelling like a girl
Who was never in them, but
Was, faintly, in the same laundry cycle as them
And therefore,
Maybe smells a little like my dreams now
Been the whole day
I can’t
Still can’t
Be the girl I saw in the sun
Behind the rain that I see, but cannot smell
Can predict, but cannot stop
helpless holy happiness
Until the streetlights pity me
And I get up a quarter past midnight
To harvest the bones I forgot to dig up,
and the dirt crumbles
And says marry me
And green will turn spring to gold
And I say yes, Persephone must die--
Let's create another miserable tale
And fuck the world
Let us live
Cross eyed and apathetic
daring our mouse food for brains
to find god in the side effects, night terrors---
Our own hand-embroidered psychiatry
Urge! Urge! sleep.